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April 9, 2010 / Nick

Good Luck Chuck

Every now and then I’ll watch a film that I think I won’t like just to expand my mind, try new things, prove myself wrong, etc. One rainy afternoon, I picked Good Luck Chuck out from the selection of free movies on Sky Player. Little did I know, the 97 minutes that followed were to change my life forever.

Here’s the premise of the film: A 10 year old Charlie Logan refuses to kiss a goth girl (also aged 10) who places a curse on him that every woman he sleeps with (still two 10 year olds here) will break up with him and marry the next guy she dates (reminder: 10 year old makes this curse on another 10 year old). 20 years later, Charlie (played by Dane Cooke) figures out that he’s been suffering under this curse just as he starts dating Cam (Jessica Alba). Charlie uses the curse to attract the beautiful unmarried women of the city before realising that it’s only Cam he wants and he has to get rid of his jinx.

The trailer:

The positive points of this film are:

  • It’s fairly short.

The negative points of this film are:

  • Fundamentally, it’s a comedy film, but it isn’t funny.
  • Charlie (who I don’t think is ever actually referred to by the name ‘Chuck’ in the entire film) is a bit of an idiot really. Probably one of the most morally questionable leads in a supposedly romantic comedy.
  • The comic sidekick character, Stu, is horrendously annoying.
  • Jessica Alba’s character Cam is pathetic. They constantly have to remind us that she’s clumsy by her having loads of embarassing scrapes like getting her skirt caught in a car door and falling over more times than Frank Spencer on Total Wipeout.
  • Most crappy sex comedy films are satisfied with just one montage of the lead shagging everything that moves. this film manages to have TWO of these montages. The curse is not an allegory for some kind of sexually transmitted disease. It’s just an excuse stretch a very thin plot out into a full-length feature.
  • If you have a weak stomach you should stop the film when he sleeps with the obese secretary and long before he has sex with the terminally obese Eleanor (see below).
    WARNING: Before clicking on this video link (which opens in YouTube), please note that despite what the title of this video below may suggest, this is really just one of the worst things ever.
  • The eclipsing black cloud that sat above me after viewing this film stayed for a significant period of time. It really upsets me that this film actually exists and wasn’t just something that was made up in the darkest corner of my mind. I think I would be a much happier person now if Good Luck Chuck had never entered my life.

Simply put, this is without question the worst film I have ever seen in my entire life.

Review: Utterly abhorrent and it’s not even trying to be.


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